insert witty title here

Happy Birthday to son #2, who is 14 years old today.

I don't know where you got your high IQ from, but it clearly didn't come from your mother or I. You've always been a good son and I'm so very proud of you.

You're one of those rare people who can accomplish anything they set their mind to and make it look easy. As you continue to grow and mature, I know that you're going to become a very fine man.

I'm blessed with such wonderful kids


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I have nothing to say today, so here's a picture of a bunny with a pancake on it's head.















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I took son #2 to see V for Vendetta last night and we both heartily enjoyed it. Natalie Portman is (as always) breathtaking and it's the first time I've been able to watch Hugo Weaving in a movie without expecting him to say "Missssterrrrr Anderson"


Happy Humpday!


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Am I the only one who has nights like this?

10 pm: lights out and fast asleep

12:15 in the morning: wake up momentarily and glimpse at the clock. I say to myself: "Oh wow, it's only midnight? I feel like I've slept for eight hours already!" then I conk back out.

3:07 in the morning: wake up again and look at the clock. "This is great! I feel like I've been sleeping forever - and I still have several more hours to go! Cool" and then back to snoring (not that I snore!)

5:30 and the coffee maker goes off: I wake up feeling like defrosted death and can barely get my eyes open to see the clock. "Urgh....what the Hell happened? Why am I so bloody tired??"


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I don't think I'll ever understand people. I mean who the fcuk has these ideas, let alone carries them out?


Rock 'em, Sock 'em Toddlers!

KILLEEN, Texas - A Fort Hood soldier and his wife have been accused of injury to a child for allegedly forcing their 3-year-old daughter to beat up an older boy as they videotaped it, Killeen police said.

Dennis Michael Bittinger, 22, was arrested Wednesday and his wife, Rhonda Nicole Bittinger, 23, was taken into custody Thursday, police said.

The fight allegedly occurred Saturday while the couple babysat for the 5-year-old son of a friend, police said. When the boy's mother arrived to pick him up, she turned on the couple's video camera, which had previously been used to tape the children playing.

Police said the tape shows the soldier commanding his daughter to knock the victim down, kick him and hit him in the face. The girl follows her father's instructions as the boy cries and pleads for her to stop, police said.

The tape also shows the man declaring his daughter the "winner," and he shoves the boy and demands to know why he didn't defend himself, police said.

clearly, the kid forgot about the first rule of Fight Club...


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Frankly, if I was paying state taxes in Colorado I'd be wondering why I'm footing the bill for transgendered hormone treatments for any criminal, let alone a convicted pedophile.


Poor, poor, pitiful me

With B-cup-sized breasts, a feminine gait and long, curly hair, Christopher "Kitty" Grey causes a stir every time the inmate enters a cellblock.

But instead of reveling in the attention as he is moved from prison to prison, Grey, who is serving 16 years to life for molesting an 8-year-old girl for five years, said he cringes every time he hears the whistles and catcalls...

...The transgendered inmate said he belongs in a women's prison, but, by state policy, he can't because he has male genitalia.

Grey believes Colorado has a constitutional obligation to perform a sex-change operation on him so he can go to a women's prison. He's filed a lawsuit against the state, demanding he be given a psychologist who is a gender specialist...

...Grey has appealed to the Colorado Supreme Court. If Grey wins, the expert would undoubtedly conclude Grey must have the operation for his mental and emotional well-being, he said...

...Already, Colorado is providing Grey with 2 milligrams a day of estrace, which softens his skin, and 50 milligrams of aldactone, which suppresses testosterone and promotes breast growth.

He and 18 other transgendered inmates get the medicine or special psychological counseling. Those who get the medicine do so because they were already using it before their convictions and it would cause too much emotional upheaval in their lives if it were denied.

But prison doctors and psychologists say the next step - a sex-change operation - would be too complicated to arrange in prison. It would not only be expensive but also could endanger the inmate, they said.

Hormone treatments cost between $50 and $500 a year, said Dr. James Michaud, chief of mental health for the Colorado Department of Corrections. And a sex-change operation can cost $14,000 or more, Grey said.

"We're not in the business of providing elective care," said Dr. Cary Shames, the Department of Corrections' chief medical officer...

...In other prisons, he twice became the sexual partner of tougher inmates who protected him, saying it was only for survival's sake.

"I shouldn't have to prostitute myself to remain safe,"

You should have thought of that before you diddled a little girl, bub.



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I had a wonderful brunch with two of my kids this morning - it made my whole week.


:)


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Kill the Convert!

(For those of you living in a bubble, Abdul Rahman is an Afghani who converted to Christianity from Islam. This is a crime punishable by death.)

Increasing international pressure over the case of Christian convert Abdul Rahman is forcing the Afghan government to play a careful balancing act between its Western allies and religious conservatives at home.
Under the interpretation of Islamic Sharia law on which Afghanistan's constitution is based, Mr Rahman faces the death penalty unless he reconverts to Islam.

"The Prophet Muhammad has said several times that those who convert from Islam should be killed if they refuse to come back," says Ansarullah Mawlafizada, the trial judge.

"Islam is a religion of peace, tolerance, kindness and integrity. That is why we have told him if he regrets what he did, then we will forgive him," he told the BBC News website.

'Deserves it'

The judge's comments are one indication of why President Hamid Karzai, who already has a reputation for being pro-Western, faces some difficult choices.
The president has yet to comment publicly on the trial but statements put out by his office point out that, while the government respects human rights and personal freedom, the country has an independent judicial system.

In practice, it is even more complicated.

The Afghan judiciary is dominated by religious conservatives, many with strong religious ties or backgrounds.

Many feel it will be difficult for the president and the government to confront the judiciary.

But the bigger problem confronting the president is that an overwhelming number of ordinary Afghans appear to believe Mr Rahman has erred and deserves to be executed.
At Friday prayers in mosques across the Afghan capital, the case of Abdul Rahman and the consequent international outcry is the hot topic of discussion and the centrepiece of sermons.

"We will not let anyone interfere with our religious practices," declared cleric Inayatullah at Kabul's Pulakasthy mosque, one of the city's largest.
"What Rahman has done is wrong and he must be punished."

Public mood

The issue has not reached the stage of street protests, as was the case recently during demonstrations against the publication in the West of cartoons satirising the Prophet Muhammad.

But there is little doubt that feelings run deep and can easily be inflamed.

"What is wrong with Islam that he should want to convert?" asks an agitated Abdul Zahid Payman.

"The courts should punish him and he should be put to death."

Few were willing to listen to the growing condemnation in the West.

"According to Islamic law he should be sentenced to death because God has clearly stated that Christianity is forbidden in our land," says Mohammed Qadir, another worshipper.

This all seems like something out of Monty Python's Life of Brian:

Matthias: Look, I don't think it should be a sin, just for saying "Jehovah".
[Everyone gasps]
Jewish Official: You're only making it worse for yourself!
Matthias: Making it worse? How can it be worse? Jehovah! Jehovah! Jehovah!
Jewish Official: I'm warning you! If you say "Jehovah" one more time (gets hit with rock) RIGHT! Who did that? Come on, who did it?
Stoners: She did! She did! (suddenly speaking as men) He! He did! He!
Jewish Official: Was it you?
Stoner: Yes.
Jewish Official: Right...
Stoner: Well you did say "Jehovah. "
[Crowd throws rocks at the stoner]
Jewish Official: STOP IT! STOP IT! STOP IT RIGHT NOW! STOP IT! All right, no one is to stone _anyone_ until I blow this whistle. Even... and I want to make this absolutely clear... even if they do say, "Jehovah. "
[Crowd stones the Jewish Official to death]



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Welcome to the neighbourhood! Now die, bitch!

I want your husband

When Brian and Angela Hausler moved from St. Louis to Bonne Terre in 2004, they didn't know many people in the southeastern Missouri town. Maybe that's why they were so quick last year to befriend Tina Vazquez, a mother of two who had recently separated from her husband.

Vazquez stopped by the Hausler house just about every day. And after Angela Hausler came down with a mysterious illness in December, Vazquez offered to help clean the Hauslers' home and watch their three children, said Brian Hausler.

On Saturday, when Vazquez gave Angela Hausler some antibiotics, it seemed like another act of kindness from a considerate friend. But Angela Hausler collapsed 20 minutes later and was rushed to the hospital, where she remained in stable condition Tuesday.

Now, Vazquez, 33, is in jail, accused of poisoning Angela Hausler in a plot to build a future with Brian Hausler.

Police said the capsules that triggered Angela's collapse didn't contain antibiotics - they were filled with sodium nitrite, a meat preservative that can cause heart attacks. The second capsule was never taken and later tested positive for sodium nitrite, according to police.

Brian Hausler became suspicious on Sunday and confronted Vazquez. He said she offered to exchange him several capsules for the one his wife didn't take. When he pressed her about whether she had put anything in the capsules, Vazquez said she wanted to take his wife's place, Brian Hausler said.

Vazquez was arrested hours later. She confessed to police that she put the powder inside the capsule because "this would give her time alone with the victim's husband," a police affidavit stated....

...Vazquez and the Hauslers met through their teenage children, who attended the same school and dated briefly. Brian Hausler said that after Vazquez and her husband separated in winter, the woman began spending more at the Hauslers' home. Daily visits sometimes lasted hours, he said.

"At one point, I remember telling my wife that I wanted (Vazquez) around less because it didn't seem like we could have any family time," Brian Hausler said, noting that his wife rejected the idea because she felt sorry for the woman.

Not long after Vazquez became a fixture at the house, Angela Hausler started getting sick, Brian Hausler said.

Brian Hausler said he now believes that Vazquez was poisoning his wife for months, and that the fatigue and illness that Angela Hausler has been suffering since December might have had something to do with the fountain sodas that Vazquez brought to her at lunchtime just about every day.

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A long time ago, while still living in Montreal, I had occasion to rent a basement apartment in, how can I put this...a low-rent part of town. As a result of some abrupt changes to my situation I was pressed for time in my search for a place and did not have the luxury of being particularly choosey.

While touring the prospective apartment, I noticed a couple of cockroach corpses in the kitchen cupboard and the apartment manager assured me that the entire building had recently been sprayed. That assurance coupled with my need for a speedy roof over my head sealed the deal and I moved in the next day.

For the first few days I busied myself with unpacking and setting up the waterbed I had at the time. It was a queen-sized affair and took forever to fill and heat...but there's nothing like a sleeping on a giant hot water bottle during a freezing, damp Montreal winter.

About a week into my residency, I spotted my first live roach in the kitchen.

"Hmmm...," I thought, " they must have missed that one". Being ignorant about the lifestyle and durability of your average cockroach, I figured that seeing one meant that there was only one to see.

I mentioned it to the building manager and he gave me a couple of roach traps to put in the kitchen. If you aren't familiar with the product, they're basically a small cardboard box, roughly the size of a large box of matches and open at both ends. The inside is covered with a very sticky substance upon which the hapless roach walks, causing his little feet to become stuck. I set them out and went to bed, curious to see if they'd work and nab the little sucker.

The next morning I awoke as usual and wandered into the kitchen to check. Imagine my surprise when I glanced into the box, expecting to see one lonely roach, and discovered that the trap was so filled with cockroaches that I could barely see the other open end of the box. Yeesh! Talk about your heebie-jeebies! The other box was no different. It looked like some ghetto version of Barrel of Monkeys. Suitably repulsed, I again spoke to the building manager, who expressed much surprise and shock over my announcement. Then, in a sotto voce he said "it's those damned Vietnamese!". About this time I began reconsidering my choice of places to live, but I was going to have to live with it until Spring so I settled in for a long siege.

Over the winter I must have gone through hundreds of those roach traps but it was like there was a free-flowing pipeline that led from the Acme Cockroach Factory straight to my kitchen. All my food was sealed in plastic and stored in the fridge - even my saltines. I kept the plug in the bathtub except when I was showering and all my glasses and cups were upside-down on the shelves. I was even shaking my underwear out before I put it on. Laying in bed at night, I'd be awoken by the skittering of little feet across my uncovered chest or arm.

April couldn't come fast enough and it was a happy day when I found a new place to live. Since i was determined not to bring any of the little fuckers with me, preparing to move was a laborious process as I has to search everything before sealing it in plastic and putting it in a moving box - which was then put into a sealed garbage bag. The last thing to go was the waterbed - which took a couple of days to empty of water. As I folded up the emptied mattress and removed the plywood supports I discovered that all through the winter, I'd been sleeping above a seething, boiling mass of cockroaches - all happily breeding in the dark, humidity below my bed. I'm not exaggerating when I say that it looked as if someone had dumped out a five-gallon bucket of them. With a loud "Yaaarrrgh!" I abruptly decided to leave the bed where it was and get the hell out of there.

My last memory of the place is the building manager puzzledly waving goodbye and wondering why I'd leave a perfectly good bed behind.


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Aromatherapoo?

Japanese researchers have succeeded in making the sweet smell of vanilla come out of cow dung.

A heating process allows cow feces to produce vanillin, the main component of the vanilla-bean extract, said Mayu Yamamoto of the International Medical Centre.

It could be used in shampoo and candles but not food as "it would be difficult for people to accept [given disclosure of] origins of ingredients".

the question I keep coming back to is what possessed someone to think up and research this in the first place.


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More news from the shallow end of the gene pool:

Man sues himself for negligence

Curtis Gokey has only himself to blame for an accident, but he sued anyway.

Gokey is suing the city of Lodi for driving a dump truck into his car. The only thing is, he was the city employee driving the truck.

Gokey was driving the truck when he backed into his own car. He filed a $3,600 claim for damages, which the city rejected.

City attorneys said Gokey was essentially suing himself.

Now, Gokey's wife is filing a claim in her own name, saying she's the one who uses the car. The city has rejected her claim, too. But Rhonda Gokey isn't giving up so easily. She said she's not as nice as her husband. She insisted she has "the right to sue the city because a city's vehicle damaged my private vehicle."

"I'm not as nice as my husband"

What a charming characteristic to be proud of...


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I don't know if it was drugs he was taking or drugs he needed to be taking, but something was out of whack...

Man Wearing Milk Crate Robs Store

PELHAM, Ga. -- Police said a man robbed a Georgia convenience store last weekend with a milk crate on his head, and the whole incident was caught on surveillance tape.

Police in Pelham, Ga., said the man beneath the mask was Marty Simpson, 46.

Simpson allegedly robbed the clerk at gunpoint and then ditched the milk crate in the parking lot, giving everyone outside a good look at his face.

Officers tracked him down about two hours after the robbery.

Simpson faces charges of armed robbery, aggravated assault and burglary.

Police said he also robbed another convenience store earlier the same day


~ Distributed by Internet Broadcasting Systems, Inc.

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The interior decor specialists at Home Visions offer a variety of products, some of which come under their "fitness & spa" collection. Of these, they are offering this product for $199.00.




SlamMan

SlamMan offers everything your could ask for in a workout… aerobic conditioning… major muscle toning… great stress relief. He's challenging, he's fun, he's friendly, he's incredibly effective.

SlamMan is made of thick high-density, reinforced blow molded polyethylene. His molded foam striking surface naturally absorbs blows. No matter how many times or how hard you hit him he will always return to his original shape. SlamMan LED target lights are programmed to light up in challenging sequence...he leads you through a variety of exciting workouts.

SlamMan's sensor allows you to adjust him to your punch. Fill with 240 pounds of sand for stability. He adjusts quickly to three different heights, 64", 68" and 72". SlamMan's computer has 15 programs to allow you from three challenge levels and 5 different boxing programs, plus the random program for a real challenge, it will also time and score a workout.

Comes with 12 oz. boxing gloves, instructional video, eating plan, and owner's manual. Imported. Measures 54"H x 19-1/2"W x 17-3/4"D.

And it got me thinking...why does it have to be called SlamMan? No one has ever accused me of being politically correct, but do we really need to promote violence against men as a socially acceptable method of exercise? Why can't it just be "The Slammer" or something equally androgynous?

And for those of you who might think "what's the big deal", let's rephrase the write-up and see if it still sounds inoffensive:

Slamwoman offers everything your could ask for in a workout… aerobic conditioning… major muscle toning… great stress relief. She's challenging, she's fun, she's friendly, she's incredibly effective.

SlamWoman is made of thick high-density, reinforced blow molded polyethylene. Her molded foam striking surface naturally absorbs blows. No matter how many times or how hard you hit her she will always return to her original shape. SlamWoman LED target lights are programmed to light up in challenging sequence...she leads you through a variety of exciting workouts.

SlamWoman's sensor allows you to adjust her to your punch. Fill with 240 pounds of sand for stability. She adjusts quickly to three different heights, 64", 68" and 72". SlamWoman's computer has 15 programs to allow you from three challenge levels and 5 different boxing programs, plus the random program for a real challenge, it will also time and score a workout.

Comes with 12 oz. boxing gloves, instructional video, eating plan, and owner's manual. Imported. Measures 54"H x 19-1/2"W x 17-3/4"D.

Yeah, that would go over well...



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I have an ethical dilemma for you:

I've been invited to a stag party this coming Saturday, for one of the fellows that owns the sports nutrition store I mentioned last Sunday.

The 26 year-old fellow who's getting married is quite religious and a self-proclaimed virgin. I actually don't know him that well, so I was quite surprised when his brother telephoned me to invite me to attend.

My first thought was "What the hell is a religious virgin doing having a stag party??"

Then I thought "Why the heck is he calling me? He must be pretty hard up for people to come...well if that's the case, maybe I should go just so there's at least one person who cares that this guy is getting married, not that I really care"

And lastly I have to admit that I was curious to know exactly what a stag party for a virginal Christian would consist of.

So I reservedly said okay.

His brother said "Great, this is what we'll be doing...."

I was all ears now! Here comes the good stuff! Was he going to go all out on hookers and liquor? Rent a hotel room in downtown Vancouver and bring in fifteen exotic dancers to inflame our lust?


"First," he said, "we're going to go bowling..."




Bowling? WTF???


"Then we'll have dinner..."


Uh-oh...


"...and then go back to my place to play poker"


Riiiiggghhht...


The next day, a group of friends from the gym decided that we should all go into downtown Vancouver on Saturday, for a night of dancing and general carousing. Suffice to say that I think it beats Bowling for Strangers out for personal interest.




So...stag or Vancouver?


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A guy walking down the street sees a woman with perfect breasts. He says to her, "Hey miss, would you let me bite your breasts for $100 dollars?

"Are you nuts? !!" she replies, and keeps walking away. He turns around, runs around the block and gets to the corner before she does.

"Would you let me bite your breasts for $1,000 dollars?" he asks again.

"Listen you; I'm not that kind of woman! Got it?" So the guy runs around the next block and faces her again. "Would you let me bite your breasts just once for $10,000 dollars?"

She thinks about it for a while and says, "Hmmm, $10,000 dollars, eh? Ok, just once, but not here. Let's go to that dark alley over there."

So they go into the alley, where she takes off her blouse to reveal the most perfect breasts in the world. As soon as he sees them, he grabs them and starts caressing them, fondling them slowly, kissing them, licking them, burying his face in them, but not biting them.

The woman finally gets annoyed and asks, "Well? Are you gonna bite them or not?"

"Nah", he replies. "Costs too much..."


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First it was door-to-door tattoo artists and now it's door-to-door strippers. What's next?

ATASCADERO, Calif. (AP) - A retired salesman alleged a stripper and her friend beat and robbed him in his home. John Skinner, 54, said he was on his way to Bible study on Jan. 23 when exotic dancer Maureen Murphy, 25, knocked on his door and offered him a free strip-o-gram.

Murphy said a friend had already paid for the show, police said.

When Skinner agreed to let her perform, knife wielding Richard Adam, 23, allegedly forced his way inside and told Skinner he owed Murphy, owner of Bikini Assassins, and another woman money for earlier services.

Skinner said he owed Talbert money for sex one time but not for a previous time when he said she fell asleep before they could have sex.

Adam allegedly tied up Skinner and hit him in the face. Investigators said Murphy went upstairs to find valuables and returned with thong underwear and medication for erectile dysfunction.

The pair allegedly tried to take Skinner's car, but it was out of gas.

I love this part: Murphy [the stripper] went upstairs to find valuables and returned with thong underwear and medication for erectile dysfunction


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It's a gorgeous day and I'm minding the sports nutrition store owned by a couple of friends of mine. Every so often I fill in for them and in return I get a substantial discount on stuff.

I've never been a big fan of retail jobs because I don't generally have the patience or the diplomacy to smilingly listen to some chucklehead demonstrate their paucity of intelligent thought...but I don't mind it from time to time.

The store is located next to one of those "everything-under-a-dollar" stores and as I watch the ebb and flow of Dollar Store customers, I cannot help but notice that the steady stream of thrifty shoppers seem to be related. They're all generally overweight, unkempt and attired in sweatpants and baseball caps.

I've gone into the Dollar Store before and I'll be darned if I know what folks are buying in there because nothing has ever caught my eye. How many rolls of flimsy gift wrap, boxes of expired chocolate bars and collections of chipped salt & pepper shakers do people need?


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A loyal reader very kindly sent me this link to a music video and song. You'll require Quicktime to enjoy it but it's well worth it...in my opinion.

The link is only good until March 12th, upon which the song and video changes.


DCFC Directions



thank you, Laura!


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Here's an uncontraversial topic for your Friday...

Men seeking the right to choose

NEW YORK (AP) -- Contending that women have more options than they do in the event of an unintended pregnancy, men's rights activists are mounting a long shot legal campaign aimed at giving them the chance to opt out of financial responsibility for raising a child.

The National Center for Men has prepared a lawsuit -- nicknamed Roe v. Wade for Men -- to be filed Thursday in U.S. District Court in Michigan on behalf of a 25-year-old computer programmer ordered to pay child support for his ex-girlfriend's daughter.

The suit addresses the issue of male reproductive rights, contending that lack of such rights violates the U.S. Constitution's equal protection clause.

The gist of the argument: If a pregnant woman can choose among abortion, adoption or raising a child, a man involved in an unintended pregnancy should have the choice of declining the financial responsibilities of fatherhood. The activists involved hope to spark discussion even if they lose.

"There's such a spectrum of choice that women have -- it's her body, her pregnancy and she has the ultimate right to make decisions," said Mel Feit, director of the men's center. "I'm trying to find a way for a man also to have some say over decisions that affect his life profoundly."

Feit's organization has been trying since the early 1990s to pursue such a lawsuit, and finally found a suitable plaintiff in Matt Dubay of Saginaw, Michigan.

Dubay says he has been ordered to pay $500 a month in child support for a girl born last year to his ex-girlfriend. He contends that the woman knew he didn't want to have a child with her and assured him repeatedly that -- because of a physical condition -- she could not get pregnant.

Dubay is braced for the lawsuit to fail.

"What I expect to hear [from the court] is that the way things are is not really fair, but that's the way it is," he said in a telephone interview. "Just to create awareness would be enough, to at least get a debate started."

State courts have ruled in the past that any inequity experienced by men like Dubay is outweighed by society's interest in ensuring that children get financial support from two parents. Melanie Jacobs, a Michigan State University law professor, said the federal court might rule similarly in Dubay's case.

"The courts are trying to say it may not be so fair that this gentleman has to support a child he didn't want, but it's less fair to say society has to pay the support," she said.

Feit, however, says a fatherhood opt-out wouldn't necessarily impose higher costs on society or the mother. A woman who balked at abortion but felt she couldn't afford to raise a child could put the baby up for adoption, he said.

'This is so politically incorrect'
Jennifer Brown of the women's rights advocacy group Legal Momentum objected to the men's center comparing Dubay's lawsuit to Roe v. Wade, the 1973 Supreme Court ruling establishing a woman's right to have an abortion.

"Roe is based on an extreme intrusion by the government -- literally to force a woman to continue a pregnancy she doesn't want," Brown said. "There's nothing equivalent for men. They have the same ability as women to use contraception, to get sterilized."

Feit counters that the suit's reference to abortion rights is apt.

"Roe says a woman can choose to have intimacy and still have control over subsequent consequences," he said. "No one has ever asked a federal court if that means men should have some similar say."

"The problem is this is so politically incorrect," Feit added. "The public is still dealing with the pre-Roe ethic when it comes to men, that if a man fathers a child, he should accept responsibility."

Feit doesn't advocate an unlimited fatherhood opt-out; he proposes a brief period in which a man, after learning of an unintended pregnancy, could decline parental responsibilities if the relationship was one in which neither partner had desired a child.

"If the woman changes her mind and wants the child, she should be responsible," Feit said. "If she can't take care of the child, adoption is a good alternative."

The president of the National Organization for Women, Kim Gandy, acknowledged that disputes over unintended pregnancies can be complex and bitter.

"None of these are easy questions," said Gandy, a former prosecutor. "But most courts say it's not about what he did or didn't do or what she did or didn't do. It's about the rights of the child."

As a non-custodial parent paying child support and in speaking with others in my situation, I think that these are the statements that bothers those of us in that situation:

State courts have ruled in the past that any inequity experienced by men like Dubay is outweighed by society's interest in ensuring that children get financial support from two parents.

"But most courts say it's not about what he did or didn't do or what she did or didn't do. It's about the rights of the child."

Because the legislation in both the US and Canada clearly doesn't support that ideal. If it did, there would be some checks and balances to ensure that child support monies were actually spent on supporting the child. I'm not suggesting that I have some say over how the child support money is spent but if the welfare of the child was truly at the heart of society's interest, then the mother would have to answer to why she spent it on Prada shoes and a weekend trip with her boyfriend just as the father is held accountable for his missed support payment.


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Each weekday morning my coffee-maker begins burbling at quarter to six, letting me know that a new day has begun, full of optimism and hope.

Or rather, it would if each morning I hadn't already been woken up at five by my neighbour directly across the street, who starts up his noisy Dodge diesel pickup and then lets it idle for almost forty-five frigging minutes...


...after which he drives off three minutes before my coffee-maker cheerfully announces that it's a brand-new day.

Nevertheless, it's still better than 2004's rooster from Hell.



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Thank you for all the great comments yesterday! I really wasn't fishing for an "attaboy" - but it's appreciated nonetheless :)


It turns out that I have a whole collection of paternal relatives in Houston, Texas. I knew that I had a first cousin down there somewhere, but I haven't had contact with her for many, many years.

Two months ago one of her sons tracked me down and wrote to me, and we've been corrosponding since. He's planning a trip up to Canada next summer to visit his grandmother (my father's sister) in Ontario and would like to add a visit to British Columbia to meet me as well.

I've always had very little contact with my father's side of the family - which seems to be the usual case in a marriage: one side of a family becomes predominant and the other side slips into semi-obscurity.

My father was never close to his two sisters or his own father (his mother died when he was still a toddler) and so I simply never got to know them. Once I was an adult, I was fortunate to establish my own connection with my paternal grandfather and my own boys even got to meet him in 1998, a year before he too died.

Now that my ex (ex1, not ex2) has remarried, I worry that my kids will lose that sense of connection to their own blood relatives...particularly since ex1's parents are both dead, my father is AWOL and my mother is growing cacti in Mexico. Ex1's new husband has one of those boisterous in-your-face families that require lots of clan gatherings and visits, so those are the only "relatives" that my kids are routinely being exposed to.

I'm hoping that as they get older, they'll want to find those connections and roots again...and when they do, I'll be waiting to help them out.



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Apropos of nothing, I thought I'd just say thanks to those of you out there who regularly read this blog.

I've been tempted to throw in the towel and delete it more than once and sometimes it seems like it's more trouble than it's worth to find something remotely interesting to say, but the comments and letters of feedback & encouragement which I've received from so many of you - particularly since August - has made it all worthwhile.

So Thanks!



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Cat nearly Splat

BRISTOL - One black cat is lucky to be alive this week, after it caught its head in a drainage grate on State Street last Thursday morning and was freed only after a monumental effort from volunteers in two towns.

Stuck on the side of the road, just inches from passing motorists, the cat survived an unknown amount of time with only its head poking through the 130-pound grate before it was spotted and rescued. Rescuers called to the scene Thursday couldn't believe what they saw when they arrived.

"When I pulled up ... I said 'Wow'," said Bristol Fire Department Battalion Chief Jim Viera.

"How this cat didn't get killed is just amazing," added Bristol Police Lt. Nick Guercia, who was also helped rescue the feline.


















The Rescue

It all began around 8:15 a.m., when police received a call of a cat stuck in a drain cover across from Magnolia Street near the old town reservoir. When police, fire and department of public works crews arrived, all they saw was a tiny black head sticking out above the grate.

"The cat was just hanging under there," said Lt. Guercia.

Crews blocked off the area and immediately set to work trying to free the young female. They didn't get far. Though they used pry bars, they had no luck pulling open the heavy drainage grate to get to the cat — it was just too heavy, said Lt. Guercia.

Not giving up, rescuers asked DPW employees to bring in a backhoe. Meanwhile, Bristol Animal Control Officer Dyanne Gibree lubricated the cat's head with liquid soap in an effort to make it slippery enough to wriggle out of the bind. That didn't work either.

Though the animal was likely in shock, Officer Gibree said she was very cooperative with its rescuers.

"It took a lot of manipulating," she said.

Plan B

When prybars, backhoes, liquid soap and coaxing all failed, rescuers opted for Plan B: Bring the cat, grate and all, to a veterinarian. They borrowed an old spare tire from nearby Watkinson's Automotive, used it as a shimmy to rest part of the grate on while they lifted the other part, and lifted the whole mess up in one piece. Once that was done, they transported the cat and its heavy new collar to the Sakonnet Animal Hospital in Tiverton. But taking it to the vet didn't assure the cat was out of the woods. When it arrived at the vet's office, said veterinarian William Condon, its temperature was about 94 degrees, well below the 102 degrees it should have been. Though he's seen similar cases, Dr. Condon said, he was still quite surprised to see the cat stuck in the grate.

"It was a pretty interesting scene," he said. "It's head was just peeking over the top."

Dr. Condon sedated the cat, lubricated its neck and head, shaved its neck, and commenced tugging and turning. After a bit of coaxing, he said, the cat finally slipped free.

"If it was able to get its head in there, it had to be able to get it out of there," he said.

The cat was kept at the hospital over the weekend, and despite its life-threatening ordeal Dr. Condon later said it was recovering well. Though it's a bit shy, he said, it should make a full recovery.

"I think she used five of her nine lives," joked Officer Gibree.

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I really ought to have a job writing news headlines...

Sick Bastard Deserves to be Beaten Unmercifully

A King George County man who urinated on his toddler daughter pleaded guilty to one count of child cruelty yesterday, a prosecutor said.

Joseph Roy Blackistone, 39, urinated on his 15-month-old daughter while she was in her crib at their home in October 2005, said King George Commonwealth's Attorney Matt Britton...

...The incident occurred on a night when Blackistone returned home late after drinking, Britton said. He argued with his girlfriend, who is the child's mother.

Hours later, Britton said, the woman woke up and heard a sound like water running. Britton said that Blackistone was naked and was urinating on their daughter in her crib.

The woman called 911. King George sheriff's Deputy Tim Lyons arrived to find the girl's clothes and her crib soaked with urine, Britton said.

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I have two boxes of automotive parts sitting on my stove. I'm not normally this trailer parkish but I was carrying far too many things when I walked in my front door and this was the first available flat surface to dump them onto.

Mind you, that was yesterday afternoon and they're still sitting there.

Come to think of it, I also have the passenger seat from my car sitting on the living room floor.

Okay, I have a perfectly reasonable explanation for that too: the little gizmo under the seat that allows you to slide the seat back and forth and latch it into a new position wasn't working. So rather than try to awkwardly feel my way around underneath the seat, it made more sense to simply remove it and bring it upstairs to work on. Now the seat latch is fixed and I really am planning on putting it back in the car this morning. The parts will go into my storage locker.

All this reminds me a little of a certain basement apartment I once had back in Montreal. I didn't have any living room furniture to speak of and I also didn't want to leave my motorcycle outside all winter, so it made sense to just wheel the bike in and store it where the couch would normally be.

But I wouldn't do that anymore...

Oh gosh, look at the time!

Here's an oddball news story for your Friday:

Idiot Discovered in Des Moines!

An Iowa woman allegedly faked her own death to avoid paying parking tickets.

Police say Kimberly Du, 36, was caught out after she got another ticket a month after her 'death', reports KCCI News.

Investigators said Du, of Des Moines, faked her own obituary and forged a letter telling a judge she had died in a car crash...

...The case began to unravel when investigators said Du was stopped for another traffic ticket - a month after the obituary was dated.

She now faces up to five years in prison for fraud - instead of the $500 fine she might have expected for failing to pay her parking tickets.

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