insert witty title here

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I still think Jhan is awesome



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if there was a rubber tube that went from up up the gassy butt of Person A to down the throat of Person B, would Person B end up burping up the farts of Person A?





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Did you know that Pidgin is a recognized language in many parts of Africa and the South Pacific?


Pidgin:




English:
Everyone is entitled to all the rights and freedoms set forth in this Declaration, without distinction of any kind, such as race, colour, sex, language, religion, political or other opinion, national or social origin, property, birth or other status. Furthermore, no distinction shall be made on the basis of the political, jurisdictional or international status of the country or territory to which a person belongs, whether it be independent, trust, non-self-governing or under any other limitation of sovereignty.



It must make for some interesting Scrabble games...



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a random tidbit from the late 1980s





try explaining to kids today how bawdy and poplar this was....



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the origin of the word Omelette has been a sometimes-annoying mystery to me, so I finally looked it up:

"sometimes Anglicized as "omelet," a French word of which the history is an example of the curious changes a word may undergo. The ultimate origin is Lat. lamella, diminutive of lamina, plate; this became in French lamelle, and a wrong division of la lamelle gave alamelle, alemelle, or alumelle; thence alemette, metathesized to amelette and aumelete, the form in which the word appears in the 15th and 16th centuries. The original meaning seems to be a pancake of a thin flat shape."

~ 1911encyclopedia.org


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I once read that if your female cat is going into estrus and you want it to stop yowling but can't afford to have her spayed, a quick solution is to insert the tip of a sterile q-tip into her vagina and twirl it slowly.

This will release whatever chemical signal is needed to convince the cat that she's been inseminated and she won't yowl until she goes back into estrus next time 'round.











without going into details, I'll just say that it's bullshit.



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I've acquired an industrial sewing machine built in 1906. Much like the old adage that "when all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail", I find my eye casting about for things to sew together.

Anyone with a few square meters (square yards for you 'Mericans) of ballistic nylon they aren't using, are welcome to mail it up to me




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It's been close to four years since I've been here:





my goodness, time flies...




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About 3 girlfriends and an ex-wife ago, I used to be quite the sentimentalist. With time and experience however, I think I've morphed into more of a sedimentalist. Nevertheless, I admit that Love has it's purpose in the world, even if that purpose consists of nothing more than making sure someone will always be around (and willing!) to dislodge ticks from your ass.

Because let's face it: anyone willing to dislodge ticks from your ass is worth hanging onto.


Here's a little Saint Valentine's Day kissy-kissy, for all you tick-removers:








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I alternate between Scabby and Bitey McScratchy as names for my cat. Despite the disapproving look from the girls at the veterinarian's office, both names suit her.



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is it Thursday afternoon yet?



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a wall of text...but an interesting wall of text,imo.


"Young boys are encouraged to be sexually uninhibited and associate their masculinity with their ability to be sexually intimate with a woman. Young girls however are raised to be sexually inhibited, and trained to believe that their self-image is negatively affected by sexual intimacy with men. As a result, girls grow up in an environment where men are actively and openly desiring sex, while women are not. A woman thus socially empowers herself to be the gate-keeper to a man's sense of masculinity.

Young boys are also discouraged from masturbation by the use of guilt and shame (i.e. "I guess you're going back home to your hand tonight"), while girls face no such negative emotions with masturbation. This form of emotional chastity is an attempt to cause men to shirk away from masturbation as a form of sexual release, and seek it exclusively with women. The motive for such an attempt comes from the fact that "sexual intimacy" (male desire) is on a lower priority than "security of resources" (female desire). However, "sexual release" is on a higher priority than both. Therefore, it is an attempt to shift power from men to women by limiting male sexual release via women exclusively.

Seemingly innocuous statements act as a means for women to conditionally engage in sexual intimacy as either reward or punishment for good or bad behavior; as opposed to simply pleasing the needs of one's partner. Women contend that they will be able to have sex when "in the mood", but will be unable to do so when "not in the mood". However, these statements are more clearly noted as "when you behave the way I want, then I'm in the mood and you will be rewarded with sex" and "when you don't behave the way I want, then I'm not in the mood and you will be punished by me withholding sex". Therefore, they simply act as a means of controlling their partner and conditioning their behavior to cater to their needs.

From a very early age, men are conditioned by both girls and their mothers to conform to social definitions and norms which women construct with their needs in mind. These definitions have one common element; they overplay the notion of a girl being emotionally and and physically weaker than a boy, and a man being stronger than a woman. As a result, they use this excuse to give license to a woman to construct rules between the sexes that cater exclusively to her needs while ignoring any male needs. The most common example is that of chivalry, dating etiquette and manners; all of which mandate that a man cater exclusively to a woman's needs while ignoring his own.

A man is expected to first approach a woman, initiate a date, and initiate more intimate contact while bearing all risk of rejection. A man is also expected to pay for the cost of dating and maintaining the relationship, help a woman out of a car, open her door, take her coat, pull out her chair, help her sit, walk behind her while walking up the stairs in the event she falls, walk on the traffic-side of the sidewalk, and help her in other things she could normally do by herself. When a man does this, he is rewarded with praise by being called a "gentleman" or "well-mannered" and "knowing how to treat a woman". However, when he fails to cater exclusively to her needs, he is not praised, and in some instances is even scolded or vilified.

When a man sacrifices his personal life and passions so that his wife may stay home while he works to provide the costs of a household all by himself, he is rewarded with praise by being called "a good husband". However, if the man were to do the same thing as the wife, he would be called "a loser" or "a lazy bum". When a man helps with the burden of household chores and raising the children, he is called a "good father". However, if he is the sole working parent and he does not help out with the children, he is labeled a "bad father". Praise is never given to a man when he accomplishes something that does not cater to a woman's needs. Praise is only given to a man when a woman's needs are met in some way. Otherwise, any activity that does not cater to her needs is not praiseworthy.

Boys are discouraged from crying, and learn to control their tear ducts at a very early age. When an event causes a man to cry, it is because the emotional reaction makes it impossible for him to control his tear ducts. However, girls are not discouraged from crying, and can control their tear ducts much the same way any person can control their bladder to pee when desired. Therefore, when men see extreme emotion in women, they believe that this emotion is real as opposed to artificial (acting/fake).

As a result, women will often engage in displays of overly-dramatized emotional reactions to attempt to control men and get their way; much the same way they did as children when they were little girls. These displays include crying, whining, yelling, nagging, and being distant and silent until their demands are met. By the same token, women will often try and make a man feel ashamed, bad or guilty for behavior that the woman does not agree to.

For instance, if a man does not comply to her set of dating rules, she might call him a "jerk" or label him "cheap". She may try to vilify him and make him feel bad about his sexuality. She will scold him for seeing other women, but will expect him to "wait until she's ready" before they have sex. This is an attempt to make certain that the man has no other means to sex or sexual intimacy but her, and then, to sexually starve him and use sex as a reward for good behavior; such as saying "I love you" or making a relationship official and other acts of commitment. She may even tell him that she has a one month rule, and if he will not agree to that, then he "doesn't respect her"; as this allows her to ignore his desires and rid herself of any pressure to respect him.

Women will also assert a sense of moral superiority over men in an attempt to suggest that all things female are right and all things male are wrong. References to the violent tendencies of a few men will be used to support such an argument. However, careful examination of the entire male population clearly fails to lend such support to an argument that depends on cherry-picking.

An overall view of the entire female population on the other hand shows perversion of sex as a tool to be used in a manner identical to a prostitute, selfishness, self-serving intentions and motives, lack of care or consideration for their romantic partner, a disgusting lack of empathy and love, laziness, lack of genuine ambition and thirst for creativity and knowledge.

Nevertheless, men are conditioned from a very early age to agree to the view as women as "the fairer sex". Women will often refer to tradition and concepts of love and romance to get men to comply to their demands. Since concepts of love and romance are associated with "goodness" and "morality", while sex is labeled "bad", "dirty" and "immoral"; women condition men to consider female needs an unquestionable priority, while viewing sex as a favor women do for men.

A woman will want a man to be exclusive to her in a relationship, not because she cares about losing him to another woman, but because she wants to more easily control him. The conditional statements she makes are designed to be unquestioned, morally sound, and mask her real intentions under the guise of love. "If you love me, then you won't have sex with another woman". She is not interested in exclusivity so much as her being the only one he can turn to for sex and sexual intimacy. If his actions cause her grip over him to weaken, she makes him feel guilty by feigning that he has emotionally hurt her and labeling him a "cheater".

Men are also trained from a very early age to view marriage as the ultimate goal of any relationship. However, a man has nothing to gain from marriage. It is instead left unexamined by men, why they should take pride in asking a woman to marry him. Women simply contend that it is the ultimate gesture of true love, and that nothing could be more romantic. In an effort to please women and cater to her happiness, men feel a strong desire to get married. However, a woman's goals are different.

Marriage is simply a way of making it nearly impossible for her workhorse (man) to leave her, and allow her to no longer put in the effort of trying to keep him around. She wants the legal right to half of his assets and income, and support for the children should he decide to leave her. When men try and cater to her romantic desire for marriage under the guise of love but try and isolate it to just love and no financial or legal aspects involved (i.e. a pre-nup), a woman will always object. She will do her best to hide behind the guise of love and romance, claiming "if you really love me, then you won't need one" and "it's unromantic, there is no yours and mine, just ours". However, her intentions are anything but romantic. She wants security, the financial and legal security that a marriage with no pre-nuptial agreement provides her."

The Manipulated Man by Esther Vilar


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tomorrow's post is going to be somewhat contentious but as Gandhi once proclaimed: "I don't give a shit". I'm posting it because it reconciles with my own varied experiences frighteningly well.

Some may take it as an anti-female harangue or a consequence of having been bitten once too often, but whatever rationale you use to dismiss it, it's not anything I'm interested in hearing about.




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the cat snores.


I'm not sure why it is that the past three years of my life have consistently been filled with snoring females, but I'm beginning to accept it as karma.


since the cat shares hogs my pillow, I get her snoring loud and proud in my ear. When it wakes me, I usually give her a poke or two to hush her up and then fall back asleep. I'm sure it's as annoying as hell for the cat but I refuse to be victimized by a 4-pound buzzsaw.

but the other night, the dynamic seems to have shifted as I was awoken at 5am by the cat trying to stuff her front paw in my mouth, presumably because my snoring was waking her up.



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I renewed my vehicle insurance yesterday and the bite came to $901.00 for the year. I've a 43% safe driver discount, so you can imagine what some poor slobs are having to shell out.

Still, $901.00 seems excessive to me...I think $301.00 sounds a lot more reasonable. Motorcycle insurance isn't much better at $700.00 a year, which is why I only insure it during the summer.

American readers will likely be rolling their eyes at this, since their rates are significantly higher. The state of Maine apparently has the lowest rates at $902.00 per year, while Louisiana takes the cake with average annual premiums of $2,510.87.

If I had to choose between paying $2500 a year in car insurance and walking, I'd be walking just on general principle.




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I gave the cat her first bath on Sunday.


Neither the cat nor I enjoyed the experience and I don't anticipate that either of us will be looking for a rematch anytime soon. Nevertheless she needed a good scrubbing and I feel much lighter on my feet now that I'm a pint low on blood




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